Every year, I make New Year’s Resolutions. By the 2nd week in January, I have stopped keeping them. By the 1st of February, I have forgotten what my resolutions were. I did these things while still being easily able to sleep at night.
If I'm going to do something spiritual for Lent, this would seem to work in place of a Lenten resolution = yes? When the rational side of my brain takes over (not a frequent occurrence!), I can usually come up with reasonably good solutions to life's problems. Not always, but more often than not. There are those times when I come up with burst of insight, throw caution to the wind, and really figure out something difficult. New Year's resolutions do not have the spiritual baggage of Lenten resolutions - at least they seem to be carefree. Is this possibly why I never seem to complete them? Possibly.
On this topic, as well as many parts of my life, sometimes I do overthink things. Sometimes, I can make things much harder than they need to be. Sometimes, I can just plow through things and get them done. I am usually a jumble of different ways to accomplish different thingsl
The more I think (which means the more I type) I am starting to wonder whether my approach on New Year's resolution is all wrong. I am a devotee of planning devices. I may be the best customer that Franklin Covey ever had! But sometimes, I can overdo it. In retirement, I am trying to simplify my life. I am trying to ruthlessly down side. To do this, I am slowly going through every book, every piece of paper, every article of clothing, every little thing in my little apartment that I have accumulated for more years than I care to count - and trying to figure what makes me happy, what makes me wise, what makes me less tense - and what brings me peace.
As I ruminate (isn't that a pompous word!!!), I'm starting to feel more comfortable with drastically simplifying my approach to resolutions. I have decided that I need resolutions. I need to keep these as sign posts for my life. But I do not need to obsess over them. I can just do them - and maybe (I hate this phrase) I need to go with the flow.
I have been thinking about the approach that I used when I went on Outward Bound when I was in my early 30's. I had heard a lot about Outward Bound. I had friends who went on it and really liked it.So I did a cursory amount of reading and signed up for the Outward Bound Hurricane Island school up in Maine. It was one of the most transforming events in my life. I was woefully, ridiculously unprepared - but somehow survived it. I was hoping that a relative or friend would be in some type of difficulty and I would have to leave. And it did happen. I went on the survival course, was on a pulling boat with a group of adults of varying ages.
Why am I boring you with this information from many decades ago? Simple, I want so share why I packed a small washcloth on this three week trip. The packing instructions said to bring either a small washcloth or a bath towel. I thoughtfully reasoned that this would mean that towels and other things would be provided. Actually, no. All I had with me was one small washcloth for the 3 weeks. I had gone through the doctoral research on OUtward Bound Effective training, the benefits of the entire approach. Nothing in my research indicated that I would be on a three week trip in the wilderness with only a small washcloth. I also brought a rechargeable razor with me. The instructor said that this was the first one he had seen on their courses. I felt special.
The ocean was about 50 degrees. At night, the mosquitoes were so loud that their noise kept people up. Fierce rains for a couple of days. I did the rock climbing, the rope courses, the rappelling, and every blasted thing they did. I complained throughout every exercise - sometimes just to myself, never to an instructor or another participant. I learned my lesson quickly. I had rappelled halfway down a cliff - and now had to climb up the cliff using the rock climbing techniques they taught us. I had reached a point on the cliff where I did not feel I could climb any higher back up the cliff. I shouted up to the instructor, "I can't climb any further. Would you throw me another rope so I can get up to the top. He shouted down that he felt sorry for me, but lunch was going to be served in 45 minutes and they had no rope to give me. I silently prayed the prayer of the really ticked off. In 30 minutes, I finally mastered going up the cliff = and reached the top just in time to join the other for lunch. I chose now to speak to the instructor for the rest of the day. But sulking really accomplishes very little on Outward Bound. I kept at it. In my life, whenever I come across a problem or challenge that seems just too daunting, I go back to that 3 week course on Hurricane Island - and I realize that there is precious little that I cannot achieve if I focus. This has been a major assist to me in so many areas of my life.
If I could succeed at Outward, then I could succeed at most things in life that I had as challenges. Some things I genuinely failed it, but not for lack of trying. But those are few. They are frustrating - and I have not given up.
My focus for this post in terms of resolutions is now quite simple. I cannot believe that I would let the task of establishing a resolution for the New Year rattle me. Frustrate me a little, perhaps. But really rattle me. Nope. That is ridiculous. I now have a resolution in mind. It is admittedly easier than rappelling or swimming 100 yards off the pulling boat in 50 degree water. Piece of cake. I've been on Outward Bound. I'm an Eagle Scout as well!End of story.
To this day, I really regret not having a camera for those three weeks. They were not allowed. Sigh. So - who would believe I actually did this? I do - and sometimes, that is enough.
I was there. On my oath as an Eagle Scout!
A private question for me: If recalling the Outward Bound experience has been so positive for me, why does it seldom occur to me to actually do this? Could it be that I'm human? Sigh.
