Jim Mahoney's Blog - Sacred to Etc.

47 Posts to Go - November 30, 2018 - One Helpful Thing about Prayer (among many helpful things)

There are times in life when I'm really upset at someone. I am the type of person who is quite competent at seething. I can seethe and seethe and seethe - and probably most would not even notice, but I would go on seething. Once I get some equilibrium, I go through various gyrations to calm down and to chill out. Gradually, the person who did something to me is able to go on their merry little way and I am still seething. I usually discover that the other person is happily going about his or her life - and I'm miserable.

Here is what works: First, I laugh at myself for being so self-centered that I was just preoccupied with my seething. But then slowly, I get some balance and realize that I have to pray for the person. I find that prayer calms the savage beast. When I pray for someone, I find that it smooths over the rough edges. It eases my animosity towards the person. I pray that I will have the grace to ask God to help them and make a difference in their life. 

More often than not, this works. This helps. When it does not - then I just tell God - I did my best - now it's your turn. There are some people who will never change their ways. That is ok since I'm not God. Nonetheless, I ask God to help them - this may help them, I hope so = but it also helps me.

TODAY'S GRATITUDE:  For those times when I come to my senses and actively pray for the person and forgive them. 

 

 

48 Posts to Go - November 29, 2018 - Do You Ever Get Frustrated? Really Frustrated? I do!!! I am frustrated right now!!!

 

This is a photo that closely approximates my feelings today. I just used the word "approximates" so that I could pretend to be balanced and rational and you would be impressed.  However, I'm frustrated. So many things have not gone right today. The word "frustration" barely captures the feelings/mood that I'm in.  When I get like this, after appropriate time for ranting and raving (usually silently), it takes a real conscious effort to calm down, to center, and to connect with God. Sometimes, I just prefer to be out of control. But then I come to my senses. This is sometimes not a quick process, but it is one that I know actually works. 

So, in a semi-calm state, I'm asking God for help. It is that simple. I hate it when I cannot do things all by myself. This is one of those times. So, God, please get to work. Your break has gone on long enough. And, by the way, God, do not ask for time off. I think that I will really need you around over the next several weeks. Please change your vacation plans.

Thanks.

TODAY'S GRATITUDE: When I can remember how to cope, instead of just reacting. 

 

 

49 Posts to Go - November 28, 2018 - Holy People are more than plaster statues

I put up this photo of saints being made from plaster - not to make fun of statues, but rather to focus on what real holiness is. I like religious art, especially good religious art. Cost has nothing to do with it. I like religious art that gives me an understanding of God and the goodness of God seen in the saints. On my desks, I have several collections of statues of all shapes and sizes. I'm fascinated with holiness - and recognize that I encounter holiness in lots of people - not just in those who were canonized saints by the Church.

Sometimes the ways in which we look at saints does little to remind us that these are flesh and blood people, sinners, flawed, those who were not perfect, but somehow, despite everything, they remained faithful to God or they changed their lives around and walked in the same direction as God. The last sentence of today's Gospel states these words of Jesus: "By your perseverance, you will secure your lives." Persistence in goodness, mercy, forgiveness - these are the things that secure our iives. My favorite definition of a saint is simply that saints are sinners who keep trying.

Last night, I came across an article by Bill O'Malley, a crusty old Jesuit who was a legendary teacher at Fordham. He wrote an article that brings out these points. It is a great article, especially since I agree with him! Click on this link:  https://www.ncronline.org/news/opinion/soul-seeing/jesus-loved-imperfect-people

TODAY'S GRATITUDE: For the saints I've met.

50 Posts to Go - November 27, 2018 - 24/7 News Cycle - The Church Cannot Ignore This

There are clearly some communication problems between the Vatican and Catholics in the United States. The way in which information comes out from the Vatican shows that there is not bad will, but an incredible ignorance of the fact that, in the United States, we get new and share information on a 24/7 news cycle. What does this mean?

A pope cannot say in response to a critical question that he will leave it to the media to figure it out. The Church in the United States cannot get an important draft document to the Vatican and expect instant analysis and information. People in the Vatican who deal with information should be ashamed of themselves for letting the pope get in this mess. People in the higher levels of the Church in the United States should be ashamed of themselves for not realizing what it means to live in this 24/7 news cycle.  People are informed quickly. We must do the same. If a complete answer cannot be given, then at least let people know that the questions raised are important and we're going to come up with the best possible way to address them. Anything other than this comes across to our people as incompetence and irrelevance. And, sadly, I add that it makes bishops and the Vatican come across as irrelevant. It is so unnecessary.

End of story. (I'm right, by the way! How's that for arrogance?)

TODAY'S GRATITUDE: For the very few communicators in the Church who understand the implications of a 24/7 news cycle. 

51 Posts to Go - November 26, 2018 - Last Four Days with slower pace - Feel Better Now?

We have ended what some would call a four-day weekend - Thursday through Sunday. Now theoretically, we begin a new week, refreshed, rested, after some time hopefully with people close to us. The days were filled with friendship, socializing, shared meals, shopping, and all kinds of things for our Thanksgiving weekend. Personally, I did not do as much job-wise as I usually do. I do feel a little rested - had regular Masses, a funeral, and some other things, but the pace was less than usual. I'll take it.

But at the end of this four-day weekend/vacation time, what do we do now. All too often, after time away or downtime, I begin again and am just amazed that I seem to have lost that sense of rest or mellowness or feeling rested. It fades quickly. Why does this happen?  This is why I chose the Dilbert strip above about the "afterglow" after a vacation. This happens to do many of us. Heck, how long do we lose a sense of peace that we might have acquired during Mass or a spiritual experience or even prayer. What can we do to avoid having good feelings, feeling of peace, just dissipate. My hunch is that this is one of those parts of life where we have to be proactive and not reactive. The above cartoon is typical reactive - which most of us probably do. We're in a better space, something happens, poof, "all gone." 

We have to return to Stephen Covey's definition of insanity, "doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results."  Something has to change and it might be different for each of us. But what is common is the fact that we each have the ability to consciously look back over a time of vacation or rest or relaxation, identify something about that experience that was good, and then deliberately begin to recall it, remember it - and do this a few times. When you sense that the good feeling is going away, then do it again. STOP what you're doing. Put the brakes on. Recall the feeling. Then do it over and over each time that the good feelings go away. This can work. It can be helpful. I know it can work - I also know that pretty often I don't do it. Why not?  Let me go back to another one of Covey's principles:  "some people are so busy driving that they do not have time to get gas."  I've done that a lot. It's not helpful. Even do a short prayer, "Help me, Jesus." 

This is not rocket science. But it can affect so many of us. We have to break the pattern - and keep breaking it until we get back on track. There can be all sorts of excuses we can make as to why this won't work. I know, because I've used many of these excuses, But actually, I'm just fooling myself. This can work. We're not powerless. God can help us. Good spirituality and good psychology can help us.

I'm going to try this on Monday. I hope I succeed - for once!

TODAY'S GRATITUDE: When I remember to do the right thing and break unhealthy patterns.

 

52 Posts to Go - November 25, 2018 - How Are You Spending Cyber Monday?

OK - We seemed to have survived Black Friday even though it may be less important than it used to be due to internet commerce. But now our world gets ready for Cyber Monday. This new "holiday" is designed to get everyone who was tired from going to malls on Black Friday to get to their office, and shop on line all day Monday if possible. The above photograph shows an excited shopper who is less than enthusiastic about Cyber Monday.

What is the power of a suggestion like Cyber Monday? If you do not shop on line this Monday and instead actually work, will you be punished? Ostracized? Or suddenly feel independent and defiant! It is a fascinating social system that we seem to have developed - or at least there is someone somewhere making these suggestions which seem to sum up our holidays, spending, and things to look forward to!  We have Black Friday for the Friday after Thanksgiving. We have Small Business Saturday, which is a great idea to promote local businesses that kind of get loss in a day of malls and online shopping. Then we have Cyber Monday which essentially means that people will spend a lot of time online shopping for things that they did not purchase on Black Friday or Small Business Saturday. 

The photo of the dog at the top of this post shows an exhausted creature just trying to keep up with all the different ways in which we are supposed to spend our days. My hunch is that the dog is probably thinking that if someone comes up with another day when we are supposed to be doing things or buying things, then the dog will bite someone.  I don't blame the doggie one bit.  

In the Church, we call today the Feast of Christ the King which is a difficult concept to square with the reality of kings and royalty today. This is a feast that really only was officially in the Church calendar in the 20th century. And, if you look at various types of kings and royalty today, I tend to just think, "Good Grief." Do we really want to relate Jesus to some of the royal figures who have been brutal to their people? I don't. Do we want to relate Jesus to the British Royal Family? Well, they seem to be much more attentive to their people/subjects and possibly more relevant than their ancestors. But it is still a tough call. This gets more perplexing when Jesus reminds his followers that his kingdom is not of this world. It is totally different - where the Kingdom of God is a reality of those things that are clearly of God:  kindness, justice, truth, peace, holiness, love, joy, and peace. Do these things and you're really part of the Kingdom of God. Don't do them - well, time to change.

Just in the nick of time, next weekend, we begin Advent. Sigh. This is a tough season to observe when so many other things are going on. Maybe the best way to prepare for Advent in a week is just to honestly ask if the peace of God is worth having? If it is, and I hope it is, then it is time to figure it out. God's peace is good. Stress is not helpful. So maybe we can come up with some thoughts about this starting next weekend.

As for now, until Advent, then I feel like the doggie up above - a bit frazzled, hassled, but wondering what might be coming.

TODAY'S GRATITUDE:  I am still feeling good about being with my cousins over Thanksgiving.

  

53 Posts to Go - Nov. 24, 2018 - What are you doing between now and Christmas!

Thanksgiving was two days ago according to the calendar. Now the next major event is obviously Christmas. I must admit that I love Christmas schmalz, decorations, the whole thing. It is also exhausting. I fully recognize that the Church gives us four weeks of Advent as preparation for the coming of Jesus and the feast of Christmas. I come across purists who will not do any Christmas decoration until right before Christmas. One time, years ago, I had an artificial tree that I simply kept up for months in the living room. At first, I called it a Christmas tree. Then it was a New Year's tree. Eventually, it became a Lenten Bush. Finally, it was a green Easter plant. This liturgical travesty continued until Pentecost. I finally gave in to the liturgical purists and dragged the tree down to the basement. 

I must confess that I do have a nice Nativity scene that I kept up year round. To my knowledge, Mary and Joseph and the angel and the wise men and shepherds never complained about being able to greet people the entire year! Jesus said not a word about my odd sense of liturgical propriety. And, realizing that this will cause psychic trauma to those whose lives are grounded with inflexible liturgical principles, I always have loved the figure of Santa kneeling before the crib of Jesus.

(Reader's alert: I see that the following paragraph turned into a soapbox diatribe- don't say that I did not warn you) Now that I have demonstrated that my pretense of being a liturgical purist is totally shattered, I must say, defensively, that I do have strong, but hopefully not inflexible, liturgical principles. I believe that liturgy is for the people and not the people for the liturgy. (by the way, this is a perspective pronounced proper at the highest levels of Church teaching.) I believe that liturgy allows us to connect with the presence of Jesus in a way not possible in any other activity. Liturgy helps us experience the non-abandoning love of God. Liturgy should be done well. It should not start and stop with all kinds of pauses for meditations, mini-sermons sprinkled throughout the mass, and all sorts of other things which seem to only have the purpose of annoying the congregation. When you consider all the different ages and temperaments and life experiences of the congregation, I am baffled by those who have liturgies, mass, just go on and on and on. I have never heard of someone walking into Church on a Sunday morning and thinking, "Oh, I so hope that there is a baptism at Mass today." The same way with preaching. Good preaching is hard. It is also one of the happiest things that I do. (I did a rough calculation the other day to figure out how many homilies, daily and Sunday, that I've given at Corpus Christi. Have prepared about 15,000 homilies. That's a lot.) Jesus never suggested that we should go and proclaim the tedious news of salvation. We are supposed to proclaim the Good News, the joyful News of salvation.  Liturgy leads us with wonder and awe into the presence and life of God. (Now I will get off the soapbox and make my point. In truth, I could go on like this for pages and pages, but that would only satisfy my ego and idiosyncrasies  and possibly increase your level of boredom exponentially!) 

What do we do between now and Christmas? For starters, we can each help to make the world a better place, identify people and causes which need attention might benefit from our help. I know that I can try, even a little bit, to not get caught up as much in the frenzy of the coming season (which I kind of enjoy). Can I experience the peace of Christ in preparing for Christmas? Can I help others to do the same? If I don't plan to do this, then I will only be caught up in the frenzy and nothing else. It is worth trying. I just realized that I have not yet ordered Christmas cards, so must stop suggesting greater attention to peace before Christmas and start getting to work on my Christmas card list. Thank goodness I have absolutely no culinary skills so I do not have to bake!

I sense from the above paragraphs that, as of the present time, I am a babbling brook and anything other than an oasis of peace. Well, my Christmas project seems clear to me. I need to become more peaceful and centered. I think that even Santa would agree.

TODAY'S GRATITUDE: I am so grateful for moments of clarity, even if they are fleeting.  

54 Posts to Go - November 23, 2018 - Thanksgiving continued........

 

I find that, with the passing of years, I frequently return to the idea of gratitude. It is a concept, an action, an experience which is a needed antidote when I am simply being a pickle-puss, which is more frequent than you would think. Somewhere within my genetic makeup, there are probably a few things a bit out of kilter - it is so tiring trying to be perfect. But, back to reality.

The above picture of Snoopy with Charlie Brown is an important target for meditation and action. When I am in the doldrums, it is often gratitude that puts me back on track. It pulls me out of whatever morass I may be in or feeling. In that light, I'm describing a little of my family - a topic that you will seldom, if ever, find in my blogs.

This Thanksgiving, I spent some cherished time with some of my cousins, at least the Eastern branch of my family. (clearly not a big family - but my mother's youngest sister actually lived with my parents for a while when she was growing up. I always felt close to her. She died of a heart attack a few years ago while walking in front of her house. She did the most phenomenal job in raising her five children. Her oldest daughter died recently from a bad cancer. The support from her siblings was beyond compare. These are all very good people. 

This whole clan gets together over Thanksgiving. They come from New Jersey, New York State, and Maine. Being with them is one of the high points of my year without question. I really cherish these people. (They may not know this since I have never told them, so I hope they come across this blog sometime!) The group that comes together is first cousins and second cousins. As I was driving away from the gathering this Thanksgiving, I just reflected with genuine joy my happiness at having been with them. I'm grateful for them. I give thanks. That seems to be what Thanksgiving is meant to be. So I'm glad!

TODAY's GRATITUDE: Already wrote about it up above.

 

55 Posts to Go - Nov. 22, 2018 - Thanksgiving

It is so disconcerting to realize that Thanksgiving is already here. Scholars tell us that this is the earliest possible date for Thanksgiving on the calendar. It sure seems like it came out of nowhere. Last week's storm did not help one bit.

First, Happy Thanksgiving. Without disputing the importance of our major religious feasts, Thanksgiving is my favorite holiday. Why? Well, it is somewhat occupational. It happens to be the holiday where I am not exhausted in working hard on all the masses and ceremonies. Although it is not a religous feast, it can be easier for me to focus on gratitude this day than even on some religious feasts. Is this scandalous? I don't think so. It is realistic.

Once in a while, I'm somewhat surly and grimace at having to be grateful. This is more often a function of fatigue than of true ingratitude. I have an extraordinary abundance of reasons to show gratitude.

I am blessed with extraordinary and numerous friends. I know that they won't abandon me, even when I'm a jerk. They tend to be more forgiving than I am - so they are an incredible blessing. I am blessed with being able to be in this parish for the past 45 years, a quiet milestone = but one of the greatest blessings in my life. So, for many reasons - it is a day to give thanks. And here's my friend and advisor watching today's parade while I'm working at my desk!:

 

TODAY'S GRATITUDE: Let me count the ways. How blessed I am. Thank you, God, my family, and friends.

 

 

 

 

56 Posts to Go - November 18, 2018 - The Church Is Fouling Up Communication

 

I am very frustrated.  Are there any gifted communicators in the Vatican? This is hard to figure out. Things were really messed up last week at the meeting in Baltimore of the United States Conference of Catholic Bishops. The last minute decision by the Vatican to not allow the bishops here to vote on important changes in handling sex abuse issues, including the behavior of bishops, was a media catastrophe. It really added to the mistrust that people have of the Church, instead of trying to make things better. 

If you're interested in this topic, then read this article in America Magazine by Sam Shepherd, S.J., who leads digital media for America Media. He's insightful, balanced, and passionate, all at the same time. Just click here:

Until things change (which I hope is soon), then the cat in the above photograph will express the present state of affairs with respect to Church communications. Sigh.

TODAY'S GRATITUDE: Not terribly grateful at this moment, somewhat surly!

 

 

 

57 Posts to Go - November 18, 2018 - The Kindness of Strangers and even Friends - Still There!!!!

By the time that I reached Chatham late Thursday afternoon, I was just drained, depleted, and rather surly, if not snarky. I was wiped out as was everyone who was trying to get back home. I went to Shop-Rite, got a few things, and was making my way across the road into the parking lot. The combination of snow and ice while wearing shoes that were not even the slightest bit appropriate for the weather, caused me to start slipping and sliding and trying to maneuver the cart across the parking lot.

A kind man came out of Shop-Rite, saw my growing predicament, and helped me push/pull my cart across the lane and into the regular parking lot. I thanked him profusely. But, then he noticed that I was wearing a Boston Red Sox hat and told me that he felt sorry for me as a Red Sox fan. I told him indignantly that I was not a Red Sox fan, I was a Cubs fan, and there was no way that I was going to wear my Cubs hat in the snow and rain. He laughed and said that I still needed help.

So I made my way to my car, started it up, and was going to clean off the windows by hand. A woman in the car next to mind motioned that I should stay in the car. She had a scraper/brush in her hand and probably noticed my lack of proper apparel for the storm. She efficiently cleaned off my windows. What a good person.

Today, Sunday, parishioners donated over 600 frozen turkeys and established a new record for the number of Thanksgiving dinners that will be possible for the families of those who are poor.

The kindness of strangers and friends. Even in a political climate which is lacking in basic humanity, it has not yet touched the charitable core of so many good people.

TODAY'S GRATITUDE:  The people I wrote about in the above lines. There is still hope for humanity. Thank goodness.

 

 

58 Posts to Go - November 18, 2018 - The Storm on Thursday - No Chance of Control

Ok, the above photo was not taken by me. It was also not taken during Thursday's storm. It is, however, a reminder, of what the world looks like without snow.

We have all heard the phrase that "it is not nice to fool Mother Nature." I feel that Mother Nature will usually win. One of the frustrating things about the storm was the fact that you could do absolutely nothing about it. I had sent people home at both locations in time for them to arrive safely at home before the snow. But, idiot that I am, I remained at my other office doing work that, at the time, seemed essential and necessary to do. Then I walked outside to my car, brushed the snow off the car and set out for a 4 and 1/2 hour journey that should have taken 30 minutes.

My initial reaction was more one of curiosity, wondering if this traffic jam on Route 46 in Clifton might be just a temporary thing. It wasn't. I then wondered if the traffic jam on Interstate 80 West might be just a temporary thing. It wasn't. Same with Interstate 287 South. Same with Madison Avenue through Morristown. Same with Main Street in Madison and then Chatham. Same with Fairmount. Same with Southern Boulevard. You get the point. This rather dispassionate portrayal of traffic conditions is totally disconnected from my emotional state during the ride! I had segued from curiosity to irritation to shouting at drivers (they could not hear me!) to finally saying, "Jim, settle down. There is absolutely nothing you can do about this."

When I finally reach that point of realizing that I have no control at all, I usually, but not always, laugh at myself. How nuts to think that I have to be in control. How nuts to think that the world is doing to operate according to Jim's whims. My seeming and ultimate equanimity was not helped by the fact that my rear window defroster was not happy - and I suddenly had a "low tire pressure" light showing. This afternoon, had tires checked, and tires are properly inflated. Defroster check must await the next storm. 

That is it for the storm. Any lessons learned? Just one, I have to chill out when I'm not in control. It is an unnatural act for me, but it is essential if I am not going to explode. So, need to chill out, Jim.

TODAY'S GRATITUDE: For the times when I calmly recognize that I am just not in control of everything. It is a peaceful thought, very welcome, and far too rare!  

 

November 17, 2018 - OOPS - News Flash: Apparently I'm Not Perfect!

I have had a lot of things happen in the last two weeks, including an infernal snow storm that really wrecked my plans and timing for these posts, so I'm confessing to the problem. No excuses. My promise was to write these posts for 100 days in a row during this series.  I will fix it - and by Thanksgiving, I will be right back on track. I will publish my posts as they are completed.  Until then, OOPS.

TODAY'S GRATITUDE: That I did not give up on making my goal of 100 posts in a row. 

 

 

 

59 Posts to Go - November 15, 2018 - I'm Too Old for Snow

As I type this, the forecasts all differ, of course, but seem to agree that we will have some accumulation of snow later on this morning. This photo above reminded me of my childhood in Illinois. It was not uncommon to have snow drift higher than cars, and often blizzards that would cause snow drifts to go above the roof of our one-story house in Illinois. I loved it. I never could get enough snow. This clear psychological malady continued with me until about ten years ago. I had a couple of accidents, one knee operation, and generally hung up or threw out my skis. Enough.

I remember a parishioner telling me that she and her husband would not let their children ski (they were from an incredibly athletic family) for the simple reason that skiing, to the parents’ mind was the only athletic activity with an acceptable amount of human carnage!  In hindsight, they were wise.

So I look at today's forecast with disdain and mild anger. Also can't do much about it except prepare. So - to each of you - Survive - Drive Safely - and Please Please be careful.

A former snow aficionado!

TODAY'S GRATITUDE: For days when the weather is warmer than freezing!

60 Posts to Go - November 14, 2018 - Be Glad You're Not Him or Her!

Time is a real crunch at this moment. So just sharing one thought with you: 

 

What if you were the person responsible for designing the Florida ballot used in one county? I've designed a number of surveys in my life. I think that I'm pretty good at it. However, I also know that there have been times when I've made mistakes and only discovered it too late. This is all my way of being kind to the person who was responsible for this. May others have been as kind to me when I make mistakes.

However, there is also something called double-checking, triple-checking, and all kinds of things to be done to prevent mistakes - especially in a state where elections have been a national object of, shall we say, curiosity. 

I do find all the electoral problems to be appalling. This is 2018. Is it too difficult to have clear ballots with simple ways to record "one ballot" and "one vote?"

Since I'm born in Chicago, I have an inbred suspicion when there are troubles around the counting of ballots.  Good grief, what if I was on the ballot, and you did not know where to vote for me?

p.s. (With candor, just consider the awful foul-ups between the Vatican and the US in terms of how to address the issues involving the proper investigation of bishops on matters dealing with sex abuse. It seems to be a mess, right now.) 

TODAY's GRATITUDE: People who have been kind when I really fouled things up!

61 Posts to Go - November 13, 2018 - Appreciating Those Who Connect the Dots

 

 

(Naturally, the person above is Eusebius, the father of church history.)

The older I get (and I am getting older), the more I appreciate history. When I was in high school and college, I simply looked at history as a group of facts to memorize. I guess that I never had any history teachers who really inspired me. The same was true in the seminary. Church history can be exciting, but it is not that hard to make it incredibly boring. It was not until I began to read people like David McCullough, Joseph Ellis, Stephen Ambrose, Jon Meacham, Doris Kearns Goodwin, Michael Beschloss, Walter Isaacson, and others that I began to be excited by history. These historians and their colleagues connect the dots, they help to understand events taking place today and draw me wanting to learn more about a particular time or a particular event in history.

The same thing took place for me within church history. I don't believe you can fully understand the issues in the Church if you don't understand the history and why we do what we do or why some things were never as clear and simple as some have made them out to be. The gifted church historians/theologians who could connect dots are my favorites. Whenever I find a good church historian, it is a rare and welcome treasure. I have always valued John Tracy Ellis, Carol Zaleski, John O'Malley, Herbert Jedin, Elisabeth Schüssler Fiorenza and especially Jaroslav Pelikan. To my knowledge, more of these folks are deceased than presently living. I have not been terribly intrigued by many recent Church historians.

Is there a point to all of this? Simply, we need leaders, both within the civil society and in the Church society, who understand and appreciate history. I'm not going to make the obvious political and Church comparisons. I'm just saying - not to have this is both a lack and a danger to both Church and State.

TODAY'S GRATITUDE: The above historians who caught me how to connect dots - and hopefully able to do the same in people's lives.

 

 

 

62 Posts to Go - November 12, 2018 - Why do we mess around with holidays and holydays?

 (It is possible that, as I am typing this, I may be a smidgen cranky.)

I tend to grimace (quietly) at things that we do with various holidays and holydays. It seems to me that a holiday and a holyday are meant to be celebrated on the actual day. When it becomes discretionary, then it does affect the seriousness with which we take the particular holiday/holyday.

The Church royally messed up holydays a few decades ago by coming up with the church equivalent of gerrymandering for holydays. If some holydays fall on Saturday or Monday, then the obligation may be taken away to attend Mass. God knows which planet these "law-makers" in the Church lived on. To my enquiring mind, it is nuts. They did not seem to know that, once you show something is discretionary, then people feel quite free not to follow an obligation to attend Mass. 

We also have a rather ridiculous contrivance in the United States where bishops of particular sections of our country have some days as holydays of obligation while you can cross a boundary into another state that, presto, there is no obligation. The only word I can think of to describe this practice is "silly." I would rather have fewer holydays which remain on the day they should be - than have more holydays where it is clearly discretionary.

May I respectfully point out that a lot of people do not come to Church each week and we get hung up with this hairsplitting on holydays. Bah. If you want to get more people to come to church every week, then do something about the quality of preaching - it is empirically helpful, it can make a difference, and those who cannot give good homilies should not be allowed to preach. Also, people should not be allowed to give homilies if they cannot be understood by the congregation. There are some easy changes in church rules that could be made in this regard in expanding the categories of people who should be allowed to give homilies. I just won't mention them here!

Another point: (I'm on a roll!) Take what happens with Veterans Day where we have the real holiday and then another holiday where it designated the "observed" holiday. I'm not convinced of the wisdom here (other than negotiating points in labor contracts.) 

While I am on my soapbox, whoever came up with this thing called "Presidents Day?"  I was born in the Land of Lincoln. I believe we owe much to George Washington. Celebrating their respective birthdays on their actual birthday seems like a good thing. While grouping them together adds another three day weekend to the travel industry and to kids in school, it does nothing for truly honoring Lincoln and Washington. Bah.

You may also remember that I was horrified when they installed lights at Wrigley Field in Chicago. How dare their desecrate Wrigley Field. I have not gotten over this decades later.

It is fun to pontificate, to carry on, and to poke fun at things that I have nothing to do with, what I say will hopefully not hurt anyone, and maybe you can join me in some amusement at what I wrote. But some of this is not amusing - we need to do something about it.

(I would add just one point to the above:  I think I'm right!)

TODAY'S GRATITUDE: I'm grateful when our society honors those who should be honored, especially our Veterans.

  

63 Posts to Go - November 11, 2018 - Never Forget

Today is the 101st observance of Veterans Day - a time when we remember our veterans and the sacrifices they made. Remembering is an important part of being an American. I am dismayed when we have political leaders who seem to have no real historical memory or sense of history and the sacrifices and alliances that we made because of our wonderful gift of freedom. Places throughout the world where we made alliances are safer and better because of the United States of America. We are safer and better because of our veterans.

I did not come from a military family. However, over the years, I have grown more and more respectful and grateful for the sacrifices of our veterans. In the Church, we call those who sacrificed for their faith "martyrs" or "saints." We are grateful for our martyrs and saints. We are grateful for our veterans. May we always take care of them, pray to them and for them, and never forget those who gave us an example of the best of our nation and the best of our Church.

TODAY'S GRATITUDE: For those who made such significant sacrifices for our nation and our faith.

 

64 Posts to Go - November 10, 2018 - Counting Votes?

 

 

Is it really hard to count votes? It seems like "here we go again" in Florida and some other states. I am just baffled at this. In the town where i vote, Chatham Township, there was a situation where one candidate was ahead in the vote tally on election day by a couple of hundred votes. There were about 800 mail-in ballots. They had to be counted the day after the election. This showed that the other candidate had more votes. End of story. People were polite and dignified. The system worked. 

Chicago was the city of my birth where the counting of votes had been reduced, shall we say, to an "art-form." Phrases like "vote early and often" seemed to be a reality. As I've mentioned previously, the faithful departed still voted from both Cook County and DuPage County in Illinois - although favoring different political parties. 

I would have thought that officials in Florida would not want to repeat some of their past debacles with "hanging chads" and other electoral intricacies. I've been trying to figure out why things are delayed once again. Is it because no one cares? Is it incompetence? Is it some type of political game-playing? Is it voter supression happening on a grand scale?

I just think that this is wrong in a democracy. True, but it happens. Why don't people throw the bums out of office? The same question could be asked of the work of some church leaders. Sigh.

TODAY'S GRATITUDE: I'm always grateful when people are competent.

 

65 Posts to Go - November 9, 2018 - Ordinary Grieving by Extraordinary People

 

 

 

I was at a Mass earlier this week for people who are grieving, often the loss of a family member, sometimes a friend. As I looked out at the congregation, I started thinking about the extraordinary qualities of people who have suffered a loss, like the death of a child, a spouse, a sibling, a parent, a best friend, so many different groups but all united in their grieving.

These people are carrying on with their lives, shouldering the grief and loss, and somehow putting one foot in front of each other every single day. Often their grief has been unspeakable, but they kept on going. They have dealt with broken hearts, at times conflicted memories, other times profound questioning about Why, Why, Why?

During November, we remember those who have died. That is the right thing to do. But remember as well all those who are grieving. The quote at the top of this post expresses the daunting reality of a grieving mother. So many have struggled with this - and so many other losses. The grieving process is complicated and lengthy and erratic and so difficult. It never goes away, but it does get a little better over time.

I consider these grieving people heroic. I have such respect for them. When I see them, I instantly pray for them and just look at them with awe. They are extraordinary people. May God be good to them.

TODAY’s GRATITUDE: For the inspiration of so many extraordinary people who are working through their grief. Phenomenally good people.

66 Posts to Go - November 8, 2018 - Thank you, Thomas Jefferson

A dinner of Nobel Prize laureates was held at the White House. President Kennedy shared these words about Thomas Jefferson: "I think this is the most extraordinary collection of talent, of human knowledge, that has ever been gathered at the White House - with the possible exception of when Thomas Jefferson dined alone."  How true. As I was reading and learning about the midterm election results earlier this week, I said to myself, "Thank you, Thomas Jefferson."  At a time when our nation exists, by any measure, as a divided country, we can still find our moorings, our democracy is solid, and the genius of Jefferson and the other thinkers of our way of government saved us once again - as they have since our nation was founded.

I do not recall a time since I started voting when people with different political candidates were often unable to have decent conversation with each other about an election. It is fascinating to me to see the truth of Langston Hughes poem right in front of me, "Two men looked out through prison bars, one saw mud, the other stars." There might be a common language, but little recognition of what lies beneath the language. Only with the genius of Jefferson and others could our wonderful nation survive. God bless America. 

 

67 Posts to Go - November 7, 2018 - Obsessed with the Passage of Time

Lately, I have been preoccupied with the passage of time. Do you feel this way?  I look at my age, 71, and think about how long until retirement. I have essentially had two full-time jobs for many years. I’ve never complained about the work load. But lately, it is a preoccupation, an obsession. Minimally, I focus on the passage of time. 

Part of this focus for me has been questions about legacy. What am I leaving behind? Did what I did over the years in my jobs make a difference in people’s lives? Did I bring people closer to God? In terms of the parish, did I help the parish be a place of joy - filling people with the joy of Christ. I never asked these questions over the decades. I simply spent the days, months, years, decades in doing my job - trying to help people spiritually - meeting people’s needs the best I could. Today I spend time on these questions. I’m not taking for granted that, of course, I have a decent, even good legacy.  I'm concerned about it. I’m focused on the questions and the answers. 

To what end am I doing this? It is not a conscious process. But it is definitely happening to me now - and it never really was a major concern in the past. I do not think that this means I am cracking up (although opinions can differ). Being reflective is not a bad thing. It can help to clarify what is going on inside me. 

I cannot believe how quickly time is going right now. An exhausting weekend is followed by weekdays and another exhausting weekend and so on. This is a relentless process for me right now. I guess this is normal, but it is now new for me.

I also have the predicament that my close friends are actually aging at the same pace as I am. Sometimes, when I think about their age, I wonder how they got so old - and I realize I’m the same age. Sigh.

I’m not writing these words so you will think I’m cracking up. (Hmmm, have mentioned this thought twice in just four little paragraphs.) I don’t think so. Rather, I’m trying to think this through and figure out what does God want from me at this time, at this age, at what may  be the twilight of my time here on the other side of death. 

I have no profound answers, but I do have one simple answer to journey through this time of life. I used to think the phrase “smell the flowers” was silly. Now I’m less quick to feel that way. The bottom line for me, what I now want to do every single day, is simply to celebrate every single day. I can be a downer. I do have a melancholy side that is too easily dominant at times. I keep that side inside most of the time. But I must now, deliberately, consciously, focus on joy and gratitude every single day.

Life is too precious to waste. Life is precious.  Friends must be cherished. The people I love must be cherished. If I don’t, then I’m being stupid. (I don’t like being stupid, but often I have been stupid in just bemoaning the passage of time.) Time to change the behavior.

TODAY'S GRATITUDE: For so many friends who have been treasures during the passing of time. May they live to be 1000.

 

68 Post to Go - November 6, 2018 - We're a Church - not an Army

 

 

I am often perplexed when people discover that there is not the equivalent of military discipline in the Church. Letters, emails, irate phone calls arrive which assail things that a priest has said, done, sung, worn, or whatever word you wish. The prevailing sentiment is that the Church should be controlling its priests. All priests should fall into lockstep with the pope. Often, it is more accurate to say that the priest should fall into lockstep with the letter-writer. I think that most good and kind people would be amazed at the letters and communications which can arrive at a parish or the diocese. Few are positive. They are pretty much condemnatory. There is not even the slightest chance for dialogue. And, most intriguingly, if you don't do as the letter writer suggests, then you too are a (fill in the blanks). 

The whole idea of the Church as a community of believers in Jesus Christ which is part of this particular parish or diocese is often quite lost. People decry priests who do not listen to their bishop. Or, they decry the priests who do not listen to the letter writer. This is the more popular approach today in letters. It used to be the most severe letter-writers would be from the so-called right wing or ultra-conservative wing. That is no longer true today. Some of the most harsh judgmental letters now come from the so-called left-wing or ultra-liberal wing. This is also true in many of the outlets in Catholic media today as well. The approach is often Attack Attack Attack. 

I must confess that, having been around the block a few times in the Church, I have less and less affinity for those who are always in the attack mode. I am far more attracted to and happy to interact with those who are kind. Perhaps it is the aging process, but I really respect and value the ones today who are kind. If you're going to be nasty, arrogant, harsh, judgmental, condemnatory, life is too short. I'm just not going to deal with you. Not everything in the Church, not everything in the parish can be wrapped up into little boxes. Things can be messy, sometimes don't fit, have to be adjusted, and often people must meet each halfway, or even one-tenth of the way. 

I am very uncomfortable when some of the people who preach the Gospel really are so judgmental and unkind. I have seen too many of these people want to destroy those who have different views. I am not being melodramatic, but rather just stating some facts. It is really sad.

Now I will step over the line and come close to hysteria on this topic:  I am quite sure that Jesus and His Mother agree with me. So there.

TODAY'S GRATITUDE:  For people who have raised me up and healed me by their kindness.

 

69 Posts to Go - November 5, 2018 - The Election Tomorrow

I was born in Chicago and lived in suburbs of Chicago for many years. Chicago was Cook County, a Democrat stronghold. I then lived in DuPage County, a Republican stronghold. Interestingly, many people who lived in DuPage County had come from Democratic Chicago. Phrases like "Vote early and often" were not pipedreams. They described the reality. The enforcement of election laws in both Cook and DuPage counties was, shall we say, a bit elastic. In DuPage County, I know that people in the nearby cemetery were registered voters. The same was true, on a possibly wider scale, in Cook County for Democrats.

I'm not going to get into politics, although it is so tempting. I have tried to avoid crossing the line into politics when preaching or speaking here for one simple reason. I do not have a death wish. I will simply note that, when I ventured even a little towards crossing that line, the amount of vitriol I received from a few was ugly, beyond partisan, and irrational. That is a shame, but this is the reality. So what I have done is try to speak in terms of principles. I will not easily forget the time I was speaking about Jesus' words in the Sermon on the Mount. I was assailed by one of the most vicious people that I have ever encountered here. (we really have an awful lot of very nice people on all sides of the political spectrum. But this person was an exception.)

Essentially, this person was against Jesus, was against the Gospel. I could expand on all this person said, but I won't. LIfe is too short. I would have no desire to change this person. It would not happen anyway. I would have liked to have talked about the application of Jesus' words in the Sermon on the Mount. It is so hard to talk with someone who fits this description - that their mind is already made up and they will not be confused with the facts. Sigh. It is a shame. This is also a reason why sizable number of homes have had to avoid political conversations. They instantly result in far too much acrimony.

 

This is a shame because I genuinely love to have political discussions with people. On an election night, I am all but attired in a Yankee Doodle costume to watch the returns. I love watching the political analysis. It is genuine fun for me. I learn from the analysis - especially those things that may challenge some of my views. I like to grow.

So, my public and even private thoughts for this election are that it be without interference of foreign governments, that every one of our citizens can freely exercise their right to vote, their privilege to vote, and that the people elected are worthy of our trust. Will these things happen? I hope so. God bless America.  

TODAY's GRATITUDE: Freedom. 

  

70 Posts to Go - November 4, 2018 - "I am the Good Shepherd" - OR "I really try to be!"

Do you know what today is? I bet you don't.  On November 4, 1990, I was formally installed as pastor of our parish. Twenty-eight years ago. Since we're into history a little in this post, I began serving at the parish in 1973, 45 years ago. I helped out in a lot of areas. I resided here starting in 1977 and, during that time, actually since 1973, I had a variety of jobs. A sardonic person might note that, obviously, I could not keep a job - or they kept transferring me around until they discovered something I could do - and the search continues. Due to an array of factors, my time period is different than most priests who are often transferred to different assignments. My various jobs did not involve a change of residence, so I was profoundly fortunate and grateful to live here at the parish. It has been the best job in the world - with people who taught me far more than I could ever teach them - with people who saw me at my best and also at my "not so best." 

Pope Francis often notes that the pastor should know the "smell of the sheep." I think I know that "smell." In less aromatic terms, I have been privileged to know you, to learn from you, to listen to you, to grow with you, to try things that worked and those that did not work. At times, the parish has been my laboratory, my place to try out things - with a group of people that are understanding and accepting and challenging and nurturing.We have been together in the best of times and the saddest of times, through untrammeled joy to the depths of grief- everything all mixed together over these years.

It is staggering and humbling when I think about so many of you who are saints, who have such goodness, such understanding, such non-abandoning love. You continue to inspire me each day with your faith and support. I was thinking a little while ago about the varieties of people in the parish, over 7000 individuals. Unless I'm totally missing reality, I think that i generally got along with most of them, but not all of them.

I had less patience over the years if I felt that someone was being unfair - which may be a rationalization for me or a profound insight! It is sometimes a big challenge to be a focus point of a person's attitudes, anger, love, disagreement, etc. about what takes place within a 1.3 billion member church. Sometimes I handle it well. Sometimes not so well. I do know that as the years have been rushing by, I have less patience with those who just want to harangue instead of thoughtfully contribute to an issue or a conversation. Sometimes people do focus on people in my line of work and somehow blame us for not handling everything or controlling everything - or take whatever concerns or problems they have with the church and place it on me. I can't make everything happen. I cannot even control everything in a a parish or diocese or universal church. So many things are beyond my control, but I have little patience when i am blamed for such things. That is frustrating.

The hardest thing is the fatigue that is growing over the years and especially the funerals. Enough said on that right now, but it takes a cumulative toll. To be here is in no way an easy job, bu it is wonderful, wonderful, wonderful. You give me joy.

I smile when I look at my Christmas card list. Pretty much every single friend I have lives in this area. Which means that I am extraordinarily blessed. I really hope that I served you well. I did give it everything I had. I have been so fortunate. I pray hard for all of you every day since I became your pastor in 1990.

TODAY'S GRATITUDE:  All these years, decades, of being here.

 

 

71 Posts to Go - November 3, 2018 - Happy 90th Birthday - Mickey!!!!

Time to revert back to my childhood. Today is the 90th birthday of Mickey Mouse. I think sometimes we can act all grown up and self-important and somehow lose sight of the wonderful images and memories of childhood. A perfect example is Mickey Mouse. Ninety years ago, MIckey Mouse was created. This delightful rodent (all right, let's use a better word than "rodent"). or character has brought joy and happiness to millions of people. Is there a person who does not respond positively to Mickey Mouse? The absolutely wonder of seeing Mickey brings me back to my childhood when the Mickey Mouse Club was on television. We all looked forward to the weekly TV show about Disney. With adult hindsight, I considered Walt Disney a genius, a creative genius. 

It is easy to lose sight of the fact that Mickey is part of a huge corporation - but somehow that is kept in perspective when we see how happy people are when they see Mickey.  

Is there a point or purpose to all this in my blog? A very simple one. The world is filled with so many difficult things, and even evil things, that it is so easy to forget the innocence, the wonder of childhood. I smiled when I saw that this was Mickey's 90th birthday. I thought about the times when I saw those great cartoons of Mickey and Minnie and all their friends. Permanent memories were the times that I went to Disney World and Disneyland. 

It is not a bad thing to recall things which made us smile as children. I recall someone saying, "Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for of such is the Kingdom of God."

TODAY's GRATITUDE: For those times when I recall and remember the wonders of childhood. For all those who protect children. For parents who sacrifice for their children. Thanks, Walt. Thanks, Mickey.

 

72 Posts to Go - November 3, 2018 - The Mystery of All Souls Day

(Again, apologies for posting this late today. I do try to have it appear each day at 12:00 a.m.)

 

 

We all experience death as a terrible loss. The world is different. We are not the same. The grieving process is difficult, is not rational, causes extreme fatigue, and things that once seemed to secure all seem up for grabs. Truly, everything has changed. The grieving process is one of the most difficult things that we will ever do. 

Today's feast of All Souls Day, observed on November 2, follows the feast of All Saints Day. On All Saints, we pray for all the saints and usually pray for the saints to whom we feel close, i.e., St. Joseph, St. Therese, St. Theresa, St. Patrick, and the rest. On All Souls, we pray for all those who have died and have begun their journey home to God. Sometimes, we call these the "poor souls" - which may not be an exact description of those people we believe are on their journey towards union with God in heaven.

There is one major truth to this feast: those who have died are not separated from us, but are connected with us in a different way. They continue to live. We understand this with such phrases as "the immortality of the soul." 

It is understandable and human to feel that we have been totally abandoned when someone we love has died. These feelings are real. They are valid. But they are not the whole story. Death is not the end. That is one of the greatest truths of our faith. It just takes us a while to get used to it - and remember that, in the final run, we have not been abandoned by those we love. Our connections with them remain. God never abandons the ones that God loves. The same thing is true for our relatives and friends. May today's feast help us to understand that we are ultimately never alone. God is with us. The ones we love will be a permanent part of our lives.

This is why we pray: "Eternal rest grant unto them, O Lord, and let perpetual light shine upon them. May they rest in peace. May their soul and the souls of all the faithful departed, through the mercy of God, rest in peace. Amen."

73 Posts to Go - November 1, 2018 - Have you Met a Saint Today?

I tried to find a graphic that would describe in modern terms this feast of All Saints. Impossible to find a graphic for today that captured the point I wanted to make. So decided to use this people of happy people of all ages in a group. Today we celebrate the Feast of All Saints. We all know individual saints who have their own special day, i.e., St. Joseph, St. Anne, Mother Seton, Mother Cabrini, St. Patrick, St. Joan of Arc, and all the others - far more than we can count - far more than we would ever know.

There are some saints who have been officially recognized as saints, by the process called canonization. I believe that there is also this whole huge crowd of other people who are saints - who are with God in heaven. I have met countless people whom I consider saints - by their goodness, by their sacrifices, by the qualities they have which are so worth imitating. Most of these people would be profoundly embarrassed to be called a saint. But, they are.

Take my favorite definition of a saint: A saint is a sinner who keeps trying. Saints come in all different sizes, all different types of people, all ages, all ways of life. This feast of All Saints, followed tomorrow by the Feast of All Souls, is a time to celebrate and to be so glad for people whose lives gives us hints about how to be holy - to be joyful. That is what saints do. May they give courage to the rest of us.

Go back to my favorite definition of a saint: a sinner who keeps trying. Can you try to follow that? I hope that I do.

TODAY'S GRATITUDE: For the times when I have not given up trying to be better.