As I am writing this post, it is rather early in the morning. I’m just too tired to work out, so am going to go to church much earlier and spend time connecting with Our Lady of Fatima. For a variety of reasons, not all related, I have been in somewhat of a funk lately- too many problems, things to worry about - things to be conerned about that truly get me down. I do need peace. I feel that my life, from all directions, is a perfect storm.
An unexpected treasure from the visit of Our Lady of Fatima was the sense of peace I experienced. (Clearly not enough if I am still unsettled - but clear enough that I want this peace and need this peace. Not good to anyone else if I am not at peace. I do pray for peace so often. I pray that I can be focused and be happy. I try to be joyful, but sometimes it is just not easy.)
I am most wiped out after a weekend. Usually I am just done in by later on Sunday. Really dragging - and this feeling goes on for a couple of days. For last couple of years, I have questioned how long I can keep up this pace. I think that I work very hard, but the stamina to do all this seems less. Have to pray harder for this peace.
I worry when I do not feel joyful - and, instead, joy seems to come only with a great effort. People here deserve better.
Need to get beyond this feeling. Our Lady of Fatima - Help!
PS - I don’t think that I am cracking up. I am just tired (my analysis). But I know that it cannot go on continuously. In the oft-repeated word of my Celtic forebears: Sigh.
TODAY’S GRATITUDE - I am grateful for the times when hope arrives after things seem to hopeless.