If you're like me (and truly I pray that you aren't!), you have a variety of friends. I have been blessed with many friends - a few very close friends - many that I would call good acquaintances and would clearly call them friends - and also some friends who, shall we say, take a little bit or a lot of work. I'm intrigued with some people who share with others that they are a close friend of mind - and actually I would not consider them to be - so opinions do differ.
There are some friends, close friends, who are such a total pleasure to be with. I was thinking about why I really liked being with them. Here are the reasons that I came up with: the first characteristic of these types of friends is simple - I can be completely relaxed. I do not have to be on guard about what I say. If I have to worry about what I say or how I phrase something, then it is not relaxing for me. I can get tense very quickly. In the course of a week, I interact with a huge number of people, sometimes hundreds, even thousands of people. Often I bury myself in my role and am quiet. If I seem like an extrovert, it is exhausting but a necessary way of interacting with lots of people.
Those friends are treasures if I am relaxed with them, if I do not feel on the defensive, and if I genuinely regret that our time together has come to an end for this moment. Sometimes if I have been with people, I often note whether or not I was relaxed with them. This probably means that there are many times when I am not relaxed - and somewhat on guard. We live in a weird world where those in my line of work have to always watch what they say. It is amazing how ready some folks are to pounce, to criticize, and even to attack. (The number of these people seems to have picked up in the past year without question. It is so wearying especially when I am not expecting it.)
Another important characteristic is that treasured friends are fun. They don't take life too seriously - and also don't take me too seriously. I do have a propensity to take myself seriously, very seriously. The best of friends just ignore that side of me - so they connect me with the part of me that wants to laugh and be joyful. My closest friends tend to see the glass at least half full instead of half empty. They are far more optimistic than pessimistic. I don't know one picklepuss whom I would call a close friend.
My close friends are kind.
I saved the most important for last: My close friends are loyal. Good Lord, I count on this in my friends. I value this. I am one of the most loyal of people and am actually easily hurt when people are not loyal in return. I love the Irish observation: You only know whom your friends are when the lights go out in the pub. How true that is.
I have a couple of friends who have become new friends in the last few years. The rest have been friends for the long haul. What a treasure all of these are, new and old.
TODAY's GRATITUDE: Thank you, Jesus, for close friends.